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Bottoms Up!

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AMANDA SELLET, Tribune Correspondent

Published: November 6, 2007

DENVER - DENVER - Some Dads take their kids fishing or teach them to build model airplanes. My father and I share a different hobby: beer.

Before you call the authorities imagining some sordid Archie Bunker-esque drunkfest complete with pit-stained T-shirts and belching, I should stress that I'm an adult twice over, and we're not talking about Styrofoam coolers of Keystone Light. Dad raised me right.

We are microbrew connoisseurs with discriminating palates for whom the discovery of, say, a great new oak-aged Imperial Stout is an occasion of shared joy. Heck, even in college my preferred brew was a full-bodied Sierra Nevada Pale Ale, which is like eating a loaf of sourdough bread in a bottle (as opposed to knocking back a can of lukewarm spittle).

When I finished grad school, Dad sent me my own copy of beer expert Michael Jackson's "Pocket Guide to Beer" to celebrate. (More about the late, lamented brew guru later on.)

In short, beer is our thing. So when a recent move put me in proximity in October to the Great American Beer Festival — the Valhalla of the American brewing industry — it was a foregone conclusion that we would go.

Near Beer

What's more heartwarming than a father and daughter bonding over some brewskis? Try carrying said daughter's 20-plus-pound baby girl in a backpack carrier, purchased especially for the occasion.

The event, in its 26th year, draws more than 400 breweries from across the nation and over 40,000 beer lovers. Needless to say, we didn't fit the major demographic markers for a beer festival, though the crowd did skew younger than expected, with the majority of attendees looking to be in their 20s and 30s. But at least they had teeth and didn't need a sippy cup to throw back their beverages. My papoose drew quite a bit of attention, including a series of quips along the lines of "What's her favorite so far?"

More alarming than the beer lovers' unique sense of humor was the eerie keening that greeted us shortly after entering the main exhibition hall. The rumble of sound seemed to ricochet around the vast space, as The Wave spreads across a football stadium, only in a more disturbing, Orcs-on-the-warpath kind of way.

After this happened three or four times, I asked a brewer what it meant. Here was a tale of woe: Each person entering the festival receives a tasting glass. If the glass breaks — a likely scenario after sampling a couple hundred beers — the clumsy drinker is cut off. No more glass, no more beer.

And, no, I didn't see anyone approaching a booth with hands cupped in supplication, attempting to sip from his or her own sweaty palms. But that would have been cool.

Tasting 1, 2, 300

Once we got a handle on the haunted house sounds, it was time to tackle the main event. The breweries were arranged by region, from the Pacific Northwest to the South (including Dunedin Brewery), with a total of 1,883 beers on hand. Now, even though they limit you to a 1-ounce pour per beer, we certainly had no plans to down a few thousand ounces of brew on a Saturday afternoon. (The brewers do provide buckets for those wishing to dump the dregs of their samples, but I didn't see many people using them.) So we were choosy, in a random, pushed-by-a-sea-of-beer-drinking-humanity fashion, visiting mostly the areas — and brewers — that were either familiar or at least had a really funny name.

Among our favorite new discoveries were an Organic Barleywine from Bison Brewing in Berkeley, Calif., and Bittersweet Lenny's R.I.P.A. — a mouthful in more ways than one — by the punny folks from San Francisco's Schmaltz Brewing Co., makers of HE'BREW Beer. The latter's sharp rye flavor made it stand out from the ubiquitous India Pale Ales (with 120 entries, American Style IPA was the largest category in the official festival competition).

Another pleasant discovery was an oak-aged brew from Sierra Nevada that was much more balanced than some of its ilk, which seemed to suffer from a tendency to put every flavor under the sun in a single bottle. Alas, it's only available at the brewery for the time being.

There were a few misfires of the too-fruity variety as well, but our worst disappointment came after finally locating the Alaskan Brewing Co. booth. Our mouths were watering for a taste of its legendary Smoked Porter, which we planned to down with our contraband chocolate chip cookies. But it seems we weren't the only ones with that idea because the booth was out of the porter — save for one small glass held in reserve for some blond chick, who repaid the favor with a kiss. Two words: What. Ever.

Hop Heads

The sudsy stuff wasn't the only attraction, though. Like any subculture, beer lovers have their own unique habits and accouterments. The headgear, in particular, was NFL-worthy, from the plush foaming mug chapeaus to the Conehead-esque molded plastic hops, in a fetchingly authentic shade of pale green.

Neckwear was also a big deal, from the popular string-of-pretzels necklace — an accessory and palate cleanser in one! — to the specially designed tasting-glass pouches, keeping that all important receptacle close to the heart, like a locket for drunks.

Something of a split personality was evident in the magazines that attempt to cater to the beer world, from the sober (ha!) erudition of All About Beer to the far less subtle Beer, with a cover featuring a buxom Slutzilla wrapping her hot pink lips around the cap of a bottle, as if about to rip it off with her teeth. Aside from their hats and beads, many fans were dressed in T-shirts that suggested a general fondness for puns. We saw the Beeriodic Table, John Beer (instead of Deere) and To Ale With It, among others. My favorite, though, was probably the shirt that said "The Liver Is Evil and Must Be Punished."

Also on display: several kilts, a Woody Allen look-a-like in monk's robes and one pair of lederhosen.

Looming over the fest was an enormous banner of the patron saint of beer lovers, the aforementioned Michael Jackson, a shaggy, avuncular figure who looks much more like movie director Peter Jackson than the pop singer with whom he shares a name. Jackson, who died in August just before this year's beer festival, was one of the first to write seriously about fine beer, creating an evaluative vocabulary that is the industry standard today. If Alice Waters taught this country about seasonal produce, Jackson was the prophet of the craft brew.

So the next time you raise a glass of something that doesn't taste like you just washed dishes in it, you can thank Jackson.

The Brew And Cry

In the end, we only had the stamina for one circuit of the festival floor. Laden with our souvenir tasting glasses, an assortment of sudsy reading materials and one squirming baby, we beat a retreat. The grown-up Walt Disney World that is the Great American Beer Festival is fun, but not for the faint of heart.

The beverage selection was a little more limited at home that night, but there were no lines or reverberating bellows of grief, and we got to have more than an ounce of a really good Imperial India Pale Ale, which was as wonderful as expected with our takeout Thai food. Here's another thing I learned from my Dad: No matter how much flavor they pack into the glass, no one — not even the most dedicated beer lover — and can live on brew (and pretzels) alone.

QUIT YOUR WINE-ING

For those wanting something more substantial than pretzel jewelry, this year's festival also featured a number of demonstrations on pairing beer with food. Lucy Saunders, author of "The Best of American Beer & Food: Pairing & Cooking With Craft Beer," says a brewed beverage can be more versatile than vino, for reasons ranging from carbonation — refreshing! — to flavor:

"The grain that goes into craft beer typically consists of specialty malts, roasted to different degrees of caramel, and caramelization is the foundation of most cooking, whether it's grilling or sauteing or pan roasting," she says. "Caramel flavors naturally overlap from beer to finished foodstuffs."

Other tips from Saunders, who runs the Web site beercook.com:

Match the bitter hops in beer with the mineral taste of baby spinach or arugula salads, or vegetables including artichokes and asparagus (both of which are notorious for their souring effect on wine). Bitterness can also enhance ingredients such as herbs, spices, vinegar and citrus.

Darker ales, such as porters and stouts, go well with grilled lamb or beef.

For an oily fish such as salmon or mackerel, try a dark lager.

Amber ales go well with cheese — except washed-rind cheeses such as brie that fare better with a yeasty, unfiltered Belgian-style golden ale.

At Thanksgiving, try an amber ale, which will hold up to a battery of different flavors, from creamy to acidic, and then progress to a vanilla porter or fruit ale with your pie.

Chocolate lovers, check out the offerings from Brewery Ommegang, some of which are infused with actual chocolate — another notoriously difficult flavor to match with wine.

Finally, don't forget about presentation. Beer should always be served in a goblet or tulip-shaped glass in order to savor the color and aroma, as well as releasing some of that appetite-killing carbonation.

THE CHAMPS

More than 100 judges rated close to 3,000 beers in the official Great American Beer Festival competition, handing out awards in 75 different categories.

The most surreal of these was probably American-Style Light Lager, a tight race between Coors Light, Pabst Blue Ribbon Light and Old Milwaukee Light, which is not unlike a fancy gastronomical event including a category for Best Dish With Squirrel.

Less unlikely winners include the following gold medalists:

IPA: Odell Brewing Co., IPA

Imperial Stout: Deschutes Brewery, Abyss

Fruit Beer or Vegetable Beer: Leinenkugel's Berry Weiss

Robust Porter: Marin Brewing Co., Point Reyes Porter

American-Style Amber/Red Ale: Stone Brewing Co., Levitation Ale

American-Style Wheat Beer: Pyramid Breweries, Pyramid Crystal Weizen

Amanda Sellet is a freelance writer and former Tampa Tribune reporter living in Colorado.

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