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Amish Show The Power Of Forgiveness

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The Tampa Tribune

Published: October 6, 2007

A year ago this week, we were a nation mourning a horrific crime.

On Oct. 2, 2006, a crazed gunman barricaded himself and 10 girls inside a one-room schoolhouse in the Amish hamlet of Nickel Mines, Pa.

In a rampage that is almost unfathomable, all of the hostages were gunned down. Five died. Then Charles Carl Roberts, a 32-year-old father of three who delivered milk to his Amish neighbors for a living, turned the weapon on himself.

He took his secrets to the grave. What we know is that Roberts harbored a secret rage after the death of his first child. Why he chose to take the lives of innocent children remains a mystery.

But that's not the element of this particular story that has equally compelled a nation.

Within hours of the murders, parents of the slain children publicly expressed forgiveness for the gunman, even visiting his widow at her home. Some of the mothers attended his funeral. In the words of the local undertaker: 'I was witnessing a miracle.'

Put yourself in their place; could you do that, in the wake of seeing your children gunned down? If you could, would you even want to?

I'm almost afraid to answer that.

This concept of forgiveness over revenge is one that baffles some of us. Where does such fortitude come from? Aren't anger and hate a natural reaction to such a senseless slaughter?

The Nickel Mines story has spawned several books and a public discussion, and a PBS movie is planned. We have endured many unthinkable crimes, from Columbine to Virginia Tech, but none had this twist. The topic came up often last week in San Antonio, Texas, at the annual conference of the Religion Newswriters Association.

Donald Kraybill, co-author of the just-released 'Amish Grace: How Forgiveness Transcended Tragedy' (Jossey-Bass, $24.95), spoke to our group at a conference luncheon. A senior fellow at the Young Center of Elizabethtown College in Pennsylvania, he has studied the Amish people for more than two decades.

'The speed of the forgiveness is what makes this story so distinctive,' he noted. 'The Amish had frontloaded it ... a completely upside-down reaction from the mainstream.'

That didn't surprise Kraybill. His relationship with the Amish, along with his scholarly studies of their community, told him that forgiveness is 'just part of their cultural DNA.' The outside world may view them as martyrs, but it's a role they chose to channel into a positive direction.

'Some use the martyr tradition for revenge and retaliation; with the Amish, it's used to generate goodness and compassion,' he said.

That doesn't mean the community glossed over the horrific incident and moved on without deep pain. In his work with the people after the shootings, he witnessed plenty of grief and tears - just no talk of vengeance. One Amish father said of the killer: 'I have hope for him, the same I have hope for myself. And that's the hope there is a merciful God.'

The Amish also apply another rule many of us forget in our moments of anger. If you don't forgive, you won't be forgiven. Kraybill said they do not say that God intended this act against their children, but rather, 'he allowed it to happen. There's a big difference between the two.'

For an insider's perspective on the murders, Mennonite pastor John Ruth wrote 'Forgiveness: A Legacy of the West Nickel Mines Amish School' (Herald Press, $9.99). The 77-year-old former English professor's work includes books, lectures and documentaries on the Amish, a community he has studied and befriended over several decades.

Like Kraybill, he wasn't surprised by their reaction, from the quick move to forgive to the decision to tear down the school within weeks of the shootings.

'The intent was to erase as much of the tragedy as they could, at least to the visible eye,' Ruth said in an interview from his Pennsylvania home. 'Their view is that it was a horrible thing and they won't repress the memories, but to not give it any sensational attention. They're not going to be the type to memorialize the event in any way.'

Ruth says the Amish take The Lord's Prayer to heart. It's a life commitment. So when a terrible test of faith happens, 'the decision is already made. They have the strength because it is how they live their lives on a daily basis.'

And nothing could have been more searing than this test of faith. For the Amish cherish their children above everything, Ruth said. The family is at the center of everything - home, worship, work and schooling. Any attempt to disrupt or destroy that element of their community is a direct hit to the very purpose of their being, Ruth said.

A nation was mortified at the violence unleashed on the innocent schoolgirls on that sunny October morning. Then the Amish forgave unconditionally, and the nation was mystified.

But no more mystified than the Amish, who wondered why so many found their reaction so intriguing, Ruth said. Isn't that how Christians are supposed to live? Isn't that the message their faith teaches?

Both books are a window into a world most of us will never understand. There are lessons these humble and simple people can teach us.

But the reality is it's still too complicated or difficult for a majority of us to grasp. Love may be the best answer, but it's not always the easiest.

Michelle Bearden can be reached at (813) 259-7613 or at mbearden@tampa

trib.com.

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