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Journaling Can Have Many Benefits

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Lyn Roche, Tribune Correspondent

Published: October 26, 2007

Dear Lyn: I'm a caregiver and I'm writing a journal. It's helping me in ways I can't explain, but I wanted to suggest journaling to fellow caregivers and ask you to address the advantages of keeping a journal. — Maggie

Dear Maggie: The mere mention of writing in a journal may sound like a stressful task to add to a caregiver's already full "to-do list." However, as you said, journaling is helping you in ways you cannot yet explain.

Thankfully, daily entries aren't required. A journal should be thought of as a close trusted friend with whom you can pick up where you left off — no matter when you last communicated.

The entries need not be lengthy to be beneficial. By chronicling your feelings and observations, you can gain insight into your role, your abilities and your personal growth.

A journal is a log of the caregiving journey. Not only writing it, but reading it often helps identify patterns and reveals events that trigger difficult behaviors in your care recipient — as well as solutions that work and those that don't.

Prior to doctor appointments, many caregivers read the entries they made since the last appointment. Doing so can be a reminder of things that need to be discussed during the upcoming visit.

Keeping a journal is a caring thing to do for yourself, your loved one and possibly others. It contains important data for day-to-day caregiving. Should someone else have to step into your caregiving role for any reason, your journal could become a priceless resource to the person you've appointed as your alternate.

Dear Lyn: My husband has dementia. We're going to my sister's house for Thanksgiving. It's an annual event and family members of all ages attend.

My husband did OK last year, except he wanted to go home long before I was ready to leave. His condition is a lot worse now. Thanksgiving is weeks away, but what can I do ahead of time to make the day easier? — Want to enjoy myself, Carol

Dear Carol: Advance planning is essential. Let the family know your concerns. Ask for their help and be specific.

If your husband's attention span is short, bring things he likes to do. Enlist the help of young family members to do the activities with him. Children are usually the most enthusiastic and patient recruits.

Ask your sister to make sure you and your husband are seated together at the dinner table in a spot where there's the least amount of noise or confusion. If he's apt to feel trapped in tight spaces, explain that to her.

Tell some of the men that your husband will likely want to leave before you do. Suggest they help by asking him to watch football with them or join them for a walk.

He may take pleasure in looking through picture albums with a family member. Faces from long ago could be familiar to him. He might join right in with a good old-fashioned sing-along.

He's also likely to be more content if no one puts him on the spot by asking questions he can no longer answer or wanting him to do things he's not capable of doing. I hope by educating your family and getting their cooperation well in advance, you'll all have an enjoyable day together.

Caregiving expert and author Lyn Roche helped care for her father, mother-in-law and grandmother. Write Lyn Roche, Journey Publications, P.O. Box 433, Sebring, FL 33871 or email lyn@thecaregiverscaregiver.com. Visit her Web site, www.thecaregiverscaregiver.com.

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