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When Sensible, Sane Decisions Require Difficult, Insane Effort

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By MARK HETTS Universal Press Syndicate

The Tampa Tribune

Published: August 21, 2008

Dear Readers,

Awhile back, Mr. HandyPerson mentioned that he had moved in early 2007 from his previous home in San Francisco and "merged" households nearby with his good friend Hannah. He promised that he would write about the move eventually. Alas, that day has arrived.

Here is The Tale of the Big Merge.

It was a sensible decision Hannah and I made to combine households. We are both single, getting on in years, and there are many efficiencies to be gained by combining shopping, cooking, house cleaning, and general maintenance and repair. I've been working on her 1893 Queen Anne Victorian for nearly 25 years. We are close and devoted friends, and we both cared for her late mother in the last months of her life.

We've been walking partners for 20 years and took turns making dinner for each other once or twice a week. Still walking partners, now we take turns making dinner seven nights a week.

Moving from my comfortable home of more than three decades had never been part of my plan. I had expected to remain there until they carried me out in a box. But in late 2006, after I suffered a spate of serious injuries and began finding less time (and energy) to take care of repairs and maintenance at Hannah's delightful but OLD house, eventually, what had been unimaginable seemed practical.

After the decision was made, I had initially anticipated a fairly slow process, over a year or so, to sort and consolidate my household with Hannah's. But as it turned out, in the volatile real estate market, I had only two months to move. That's when a sensible decision became generally insane.

I had a spacious, fully furnished home and storage area upstairs, a three-car garage with a large work area, a separate workshop and two large storage areas on the ground level.

The garage level and work areas held my 32-year collection of salvaged lumber, building materials and hardware. This was not a random collection of junk - I knew what I had and where it was. I saved and collected things that I drew from, added to and used in renovations. Discounting furniture and household things, I had easily 7 tons of material and hardware.

Moving it to Hannah's large but already full house was not an option.

Lacking the time to sort and sell everything I couldn't take with me, I first had friends come over and take anything they could use. Then I called the Community Thrift Store to take household goods and furniture. Then I called Building RE-sources, a nonprofit that supplies Habitat for Humanity and similar groups, to take several tons of usable lumber, hardware and building materials.

I gave away televisions, a VCR, art supplies, ladders, fabric remnants, folding tables and chairs, books and office supplies to the grade school across the street. Despite all that, I had to pay the city recycling/trash collection system to come and haul away the remaining furniture and things that no one took.

With a week left, I rented a van. Hannah, friends and I shuttled everything else to her house, making the first floor unlivable as we spent most of 2007 sorting and distributing and incorporating my things into hers and getting rid of more of our things (we're still sifting and winnowing to this day).

I call 2007 "the lost year," and the move nearly killed us both. I am still in physical therapy for back injuries and have lingering nightmares.

But Hannah and I have survived. We're raising tomatoes and vegetables in the backyard between sporadic bouts of sorting and shifting things around four floors of this old house.

Though a bit rocky in the execution, it was, nonetheless, a good decision.

Share your home repair problems, interesting questions, funny experiences and useful tips by writing to Mr. HandyPerson, c/o Universal Press Syndicate, 4520 Main St., Kansas City, MO 64111.

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