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A Lost Generation Of Youths A Threat To Society - And Themselves

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By LUIS M. LOPEZ

Special to the Tribune

Published: February 10, 2008

There is a fine line between crime prevention and a flagrant disregard for rules, laws and basic human rights. I am saddened yet happy that our communities are choosing to draw a line in the sand and take action against our law-breaking youths.

I am saddened at the fact that this is what we have come to in today's fast-paced society. I am happy that our communities are finally fed up with the behaviors of this lost generation and taking action.

This lost generation of youth must learn to face the facts of life and accept responsibility for their behavior.

I have been studying the issue of youth disregard for societal norms. Many of us remember a time when we always respected our elders, a time when we enjoyed our parks instead of destroying them for the fun of it.

Society did not go wrong. However, we can easily point the finger at two people: Mom and Dad.

Many have chosen to be parents by proxy. Instead of turning off the soap opera, putting that beer down and being a parent, they choose to pawn their parental rights. They expect the school system, our libraries and a host of other people and facilities to raise their children.

When did parents stop being parents and allow their children to run wild on our streets and become nuisances without consequences? I repeatedly hear parents defend their children's behavior, even if confronted with unquestionable evidence.

Here is a true story: One youth from our community chose to rob the neighborhood. He burglarized every house on his street except his own.

The police discovered the youth tried to sell some of the stolen goods to his friends. The day after his last burglary, the police found the errant youth on his porch having a soda. The confronted and arrested him for the crimes.

The youth was outraged and professed, "I was on my porch minding my own business when the police arrested me. They had no right to arrest me."

To my amazement, his mother defended him. She continued to defend him even after the police found more than $10,000 in stolen goods in his bedroom and several illegal drugs.

She was mad because he was not caught in the act of committing the crimes; therefore, they had no right to arrest him, she believed.

I hate to say this, but that is one ignorant and obtuse parent.

I talked to the mother on several occasions, and she confessed she read many parenting books that told her she should not spank her child or scold him because it might hurt his self-esteem. I almost burst into laughter but managed to hold back when I realized she was serious.

Yes, once again we can thank the so-called child experts and their constant interfering into parenting, with their how-to's and what-not-to-do's. Parenting is more than words in a book. Parenting is about taking responsibility for a young life and teaching how to be productive citizens.

A parent should teach their child right from wrong. Parents should "consequence" their child when they make mistakes, so they learn to think about their choices.

A parent is supposed to be a role model to their child and show them by example how to make good choices. A parent should not make excuses for the poor behavior of their child, and a good parent does not lie to keep their child from receiving a consequence.

When these youths receive fines for their antisocial behavior, the parents are quick to come to the rescue. The youths learn absolutely nothing and continue to be bad citizens.

What amazes me is that these youths feel victimized. They blame society for their failures and accept no responsibility for their disregard for the law. When you ask them about their victims, they show no remorse, shame or repentance. They show no respect to others.

These youths are part of the lost generation that is doomed to a life of misery and disconnect from societal norms. As long as they maintain this antisocial behavior, they will get no sympathy from a community that lives via rules and guidelines of acceptable behavior.

Parenting is not only about the child. Remember, it's not only children who grow. Parents need to grow, too.

As much as we watch what our children do with their lives, they are watching to see what we do with ours. I can't tell my children to reach for the sky and be good citizens. All I can do is reach for it myself and show them what a good citizen is.

The writer is a Zephyrhills city councilman and youth counselor.

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