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Woman's Slaying Highlights Actions To Aid Self-Defense

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By DANIELA VELÁZQUEZ | TBO.com

Published: January 25, 2008

Denise Amber Lee did what she could to draw attention to herself in the time before she was killed and buried in a shallow grave last week.

The 21-year-old North Port woman screamed and even managed to call 911 so authorities would know she had been abducted from her home and could locate her. Authorities were able to locate a suspect quickly, but it was too late for Lee.

It's a nightmare scenario, one that experts encourage women to prepare for.

"When the chips are down you just got to fight for your life," said security expert Steve Purl, chief operating officer of St. Petersburg-based Grand Investigative Security Services.

Debi LaMora, 33, of Riverview, says the Lee case has prompted her to be more aware of her surroundings.

"I try to fist my keys and make sure I am always looking around me and under my car for anything out of the ordinary," LaMora wrote in an e-mail to TBO.com. She is a friend of Lee's cousin.

"Unfortunately, when I am doing things around town, I tend to be more lax, which is what led to the horrendous events that happened to Denise …I will definitely try to pay more attention to anything out of the ordinary even if it has to do with possible victims I may happen to come across."

Defense and tactics instructor Tony Mayo tells his clients to use statistics as motivation for their own safety.

One in six American women has been a victim of a rape or rape attempt, according to the Department of Justice's 2006 National Crime Victimization Survey.

"I say, 'Listen ladies, what this simply means is your number is going to be up one day, and what are you going to do to prepare for it?'" Mayo said.

Experts agree that a key step in preparing is being aware of your surroundings.

Mayo suggests his clients try to remember what every fourth person they come across is wearing. It's good practice for everyday places such as the supermarket to help cultivate a sense of awareness.

Purl suggests having a preshaped plan and approach.

"Develop some basic aground rules; make sure you've always got something you can defend yourself with," Purl says. "Always walk with your head up. Be aware; predators won't prey if you don't give off that prey mentality. Something as simple as eye contact can make a difference."

If you are attacked, Mayo said, remember the four "Ds" - demand, dialogue, distraction and disarm.
Consider what the assailant wants, Mayo advised, then talk to him enough to create a diversion. Then disarm him, giving you enough time to break away and get out of the situation.

Purl advised keeping a distance of 18 to 36 inches between you and another person. This length can provide enough latitude to fight back.

Preparation includes knowing physical maneuvers and conditioning yourself to resist fear.

"Reaction based on the emotion of shock can lead you to overreact," Mayo says. "I teach people how to be a sniper that you hit the target's bull's eye and cause an automatic reflex."

Resisting an attacker

- Choose a wardrobe that maximizes movement: "Tight skirts and high heels are hard to run in; scarves and jewelry are easy to grab."

- If you wear rings with big stones on them, turn them around. Not only does that disguise the stone, but it makes a very good weapon.

- If you're going to knock on a door, stand slightly away and to the side.

- When driving, make sure you can see the rear tires of the car in front of you so if you have to get out quickly, you can.

- Always keep your cell phone charged and with you.

- Keep your gas tank at least a quarter full and know how to change a flat tire.

Source: Security and defense experts Steve Purl, Tony Mayo

The Tampa Jewish Community Center and Federation, 13009 Community Campus Drive, Tampa, will offer Rape Aggression Defense classes in March for members and nonmembers. For information, call (813) 264-9000. Mayo also offers private and group self-defense classes. For information, visit www.eliteforceselfdefense.com.

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