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A Bad Day In The Rose Garden

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By GAIL COLLINS The New YorkTimes

The Tampa Tribune

Published: June 21, 2008

It's very easy, in our chaotic world, to lose track. Did you know, for instance, that "ER" is still on television? That "The Phantom of the Opera" is still on Broadway? That Hugh Hefner is still dating?

It was in this spirit that I looked up at CNN last week and noted that George W. Bush is still the president.

Yes! There he was in the Rose Garden, unveiling his plan for reducing the price of oil. A little grayer, but strangely unchanged.

When he was complaining about the way the Democrats wrote last year's omnibus spending bill, I swear I heard him call it the "ominous spending bill."

In a major change of policy, the president announced that he wanted to end a federal ban on offshore drilling and open up drillers' access to the outer continental shelf.

He repeatedly referred to the outer continental shelf as "the OCS," making the whole proposal sound a little like a search for energy sources in an old teen TV series.

The OCS was only one part of a four-point recipe for producing tons and tons of American-bred gasoline in the future. Bush wants to search for oil offshore, out West, in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, in the basement, beneath the Washington Monument - you name it, he's ready to drill.

This would require a great deal of excruciatingly controversial legislation, all of which he demanded the Democrats in Congress pass before the Fourth of July recess.

Otherwise, everything is their fault.

"They will need to explain why $4-a-gallon gasoline is not enough incentive for them to act," the president said. It was sort of mesmerizing. Imagine some half-forgotten celebrity popping up out of nowhere and announcing that he wants an Academy Award. By Tuesday. And if he doesn't get it, he cannot be responsible for the consequences.

There was also the matter of John McCain.

Poor McCain has been trying desperately to convince the public that there's a vast, vast gulf between him and the current administration. It's been tougher than he expected.

In the past, McCain parted company with Bush on everything from torture to taxes. But now he's fudged some of those differences, and completely caved on others.

There's not much left but global warming, and the people who really, really care about that will probably be looking to see which candidate Al Gore likes best.

Earlier this week, McCain made news when, in a change of position, he called for allowing more offshore drilling. It was his moment to betray the environmentalists in the name of cheaper gasoline. You'd think the president would have the decency to wait, and refrain from holding a press conference that made the two of them sound like soul mates.

McCain is struggling to put together some kind of economic policy that gives him the aura of a candidate who feels the public's pain.

First, there was that extremely cheesy idea of a federal gas-tax holiday. It was dead on arrival the day he proposed it. Besides, any position that leaves you lashing out at "so-called economists" is not going to instill a deep sense of confidence in the voting public.

The way McCain's been working the energy issue only makes him look like a man with no inner core. For instance, the guy who was speaking in Houston last week was considerably different from the one who did a town-hall meeting in New York the week before.

The New York McCain laced into oil companies for their "obscene" profits and their failure to invest in alternative sources of energy. "I think it's an abrogation of their responsibility as citizens," he said, assuring the audience he was "very angry with oil companies."

The Houston McCain seemed to have gotten over his wrath, and contented himself with lacing into Obama's plan for a windfall-profits tax on oil companies. It would, he said, discourage oil exploration.

Gail Collins is a columnist for The New York Times.

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