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The Flip Side - Mar. 16

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By MICK ELLIOTT | The Tampa Tribune

Published: March 16, 2008

Thinking out loud until it started to hurt ...

Marred in yet another life/career crisis, golfer John Daly says he is thinking of answering critics by writing a country-western song that he will call "I Guess It's My Fault, Even When It's Not My Fault." What, "Stumbling Through Life Fat, Drunk and Stupid" already has been recorded?

Bad blood continues to flow at every meeting between the Tampa Bay Rays and the New York Yankees. It will only get worse. Wait until they start fighting over a downtown St. Petersburg parking spot.

NASCAR's Tony Stewart will not back down on his harsh attack on Goodyear tires. But don't you think releasing photos of the blimp giving Client 9 a ride was a bit extreme?

A Japanese newspaper reporter covering Boston Red Sox spring training in Fort Myers was late to a recent game against the Mets because a pelican smashed into the windshield of his car as he drove to Tradition Field. Environmentalists were outraged upon learning the man had golf clubs in his trunk.

A nude photo of New England quarterback Tom Brady's girlfriend, supermodel Gisele Bundchen, is set to be auctioned on April 10 at Christie's in New York. The picture is expected to fetch between $30,000 and $40,000, maybe more if the New York Giants haven't decided on their game-day program cover shot for when the Patriots come to town.

Did you hear about the 35-year-old Kansas woman who sat on a toilet for so long - two years - that her body became stuck to the seat? Well, I guess she puts to rest the idea that nobody reads newspapers anymore.

One theory to explain a soccer game riot in Bogota, Colombia, that resulted in 83 people being injured is that it was started by a jealous man angry that his girlfriend was flirting. "This is one of the theories," said a sports committee official. "But when you have so many people drunk, drugged up and looking for a fight, sometimes it's hard to find out what really started it." Just imagine what it would be like with scoring.

First, Shaquille O'Neal was traded. Then, Coach Pat Riley announced he was taking a sabbatical to scout potential draft picks. Now Dwyane Wade is done for the season because of a knee injury, leaving the Miami Heat with seven eligible players and an interim coach. It's so bad, Cuba's national soccer team sent a sympathy card.

Former Phillies reliever Mitch Williams was tossed from his 10-year-old daughter's youth-league basketball game for screaming the F-word several times at a female referee. Williams' explanation was simple? "I'm emotional when it comes to my kids." Awww, Dad.

If you are looking for a possible Kentucky Derby long shot, take a look at Spurrier, a 3-year-old gray colt named after University of South Carolina football coach Steve Spurrier. According to the Racing Forum, the horse has good speed but suffers from a tendency to change jockeys after the second turn.

Former NFL running back Herschel Walker is about to release a book acknowledging a dissociative identity disorder, a rare malady in which alternate personalities are created to deal with emotional situations that are beyond the control of a person. So, there are like three or four Herschels? Wow, maybe that trade the Vikings made with Dallas wasn't as one-sided as it looked.

After his Florida basketball team was eliminated after one game of the SEC Tournament, Coach Billy Donovan could not even enjoy looking ahead for his freshman-laden team. "They're not committed to it," Donovan said. "I'm not really excited about seeing this group of guys being sophomores." If the Gators had advanced in the tournament at the Georgia Dome, that might not have been a problem.

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