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Make Her Feel Special; Put Mother's Day In The Basket

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By GREG and MICHELLE BAKER

The Tampa Tribune

Published: May 6, 2008

Updated: 05/06/2008 05:11 pm

Quick! Everyone PANIC! Mother's Day is this Sunday!

Is it not enough that this woman carried you for nine months while you stole every last nutrient from her weak, swollen body? Is it not enough that she went through pain like no human should ever experience just to bear you? Is it not enough that she endured your rebellious, pimpled, teenage years of loud music, sarcasm and secret tattoos with a smile and a "That's lovely, dear"?

Why do we always forget Mother's Day until the very last minute? It's the same weekend every year.

Now the scramble begins. Just like on Christmas Eve, the store shelves will be barren of all but the not-so-cute little stuffed animals, wilted roses and gift baskets that have nothing mothers really want (tamarind bath oils and flannel nightgowns, anyone?).

Oh sure, Mom will accept all of the above with a delicate smile and a "That's lovely, dear" - while secretly she has visions of working over your kneecaps with a hammer until you GET IT.

There is just no excuse. You are horrible, selfish children.

We need to save this most special holiday for mothers across the world.

Should it be a brunch? No. That's sooooo 1999.

Maybe a home-cooked dinner? Yeah. That's original.

Breakfast in bed? Um, remember what happened a few years ago when you surprised her with breakfast in bed? Erase the memory, erase the memory! Therapy, here we come.

What about a picnic on the beach? Yeeeeaahhh! Just like when you were a kid. She'll love it. Something fancy, but not too foofy. Something that can be made ahead of time. Something that will make her feel really special.

We've got it! Quick, Robin, to the bat kitchen!

This is what you will need: a blanket (make sure it is clean and doesn't smell like dogs), plates, napkins, wine glasses, a bottle of good bubbly, utensils. And a kite, a pretty kite, maybe a butterfly kite.

For the food (serves three), you will need: about a half-pound of paper-thin, shaved prosciutto ham (Cacciatore Brothers offers a good selection); one ball of real mozzarella (again, Cacciatore Brothers); a good Ciabatta bread (buy the day of); and Greg's cannellini bean, lemon and oregano salad. Don't let the "bean salad" fool you. This is an Italian-inspired, summery dish that Greg created many, many years ago. It's creamy, savory and absolutely delicious. And it can be made a day in advance.

Preslice the mozzarella just before you leave the house (leave it in the water; it keeps it from drying out), and store all food in plastic containers (this will keep the sand out).

On Sunday, pick Mom up and head for the beach. Lay out the blanket, smear the bean salad on bread slices, top with fresh mozzarella and prosciutto, and break out the kite. Oh, and be sure to tell her why she is so important.

CANNELLINI BEAN SALAD WITH LEMON AND OREGANO

2 cans cannellini beans, drained but not rinsed

2 lemons, zested and juiced

2 sprigs fresh oregano

4 garlic cloves, minced

2 tablespoons olive oil

Kosher salt and freshly ground pepper

In a saucepan, saute the lemon zest and garlic until fragrant and golden. Add the beans, cover with water, add the oregano sprigs, season, and simmer gently for 30 minutes to tenderize the beans.

Drain the beans and lay them on a baking sheet to cool at room temperature. Remove the oregano stems and transfer the beans to a mixing bowl. Add olive oil and lemon juice, and toss gently.

Season with salt and pepper; refrigerate until picnic time.

Let the salad sit out to warm at room temperature for 15 minutes before serving for best flavor.

Got a question, comment or insult? Personal sherpas Greg and Michelle are toiling away at culinarysherpas.com, where the tour continues.

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