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Woman Of Virtue Gets Lucky Break
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Published: May 31, 2008
The timing is perfect. She couldn't have planned it any better.
"But it was just a coincidence," insists Anna Broadway, author of the just-released "Sexless in the City: A Memoir of Reluctant Chastity" (Doubleday, $12.95).
The much-anticipated movie, based on the popular and long-running cable TV series "Sex and the City," opened Friday. When Broadway signed her contract with the publisher a few years ago, she had no idea whether the on-again, off-again, on-again film project would actually make it to the big screen, much less on the same trajectory as her book.
It's an unexpected gift Broadway is enjoying.
"There's a lot of attention on the movie right now. If it leads a few people to my book who want something different in their lives, then that's a good thing," she said in a phone interview from San Francisco, where the former New Yorker moved 18 months ago.
Broadway, a Web editor at a medical nonprofit organization, began writing about staying chaste in a society that does little to promote it in a blog three years ago. The memoir is an offshoot of that ongoing conversation on dealing with the temptations in the modern world without sacrificing spiritual values.
The book's tone is much like the author in person: quirky, funny, honest and self-deprecating.
"I think people can relate to humor," Broadway says.
She weaves in tales of the combustible combination of the realities of dating and the ideals of religious conviction.
Her openness is refreshing, particularly when she shares war stories from the dating front, unafraid to expose some of her battle wounds. Readers meet colorful characters along the way: Harvard Lickwit, Ad Weasel, 5 Percent Man and Poster Boy, among them.
Her message? If you're looking for a successful, sensitive, stable soul mate who "understands you and makes you feel complete," then the search becomes even harder when you add "devout Christian who loves intellectual conversation" to the wish list.
"I had to learn the hard way that whatever I was doing wasn't working," she says.
Part of that meant repairing her own broken identity and putting more emphasis on developing as a whole person, not just focusing on her sexuality.
But she's no prude. She doesn't want the book promoted strictly in the Christian market.
"That would be preaching to the choir," Broadway says.
Instead, her mission is to reach all those Gen-Xers living in a post-feminist world and struggling to meet a quality mate - without sacrificing their values.
Yes, the search can be exhausting, frustrating and even amusing. But never dull, if one uses Broadway's experience as a gauge.
Some of her advice from her own journey: Surround yourself with friends who encourage you to stick with it. Nurture strong relationships that don't involve sex. Pursue the passions that make you a complete person. Find out what's most important to you and go for it.
Broadway, who watched two full seasons of "Sex and the City" on a weekend viewing marathon, enjoyed the show. And she intends to see the movie as well. The characters' lifestyles may not be her lifestyle, but that doesn't mean she can't relate to some of their travails and struggles in finding love.
She just has a different way of going about it.
"I've made my own compromises over the years. I've finally reckoned with my hypocrisy," she says.
In two months, she turns 30. And she hasn't found her mate for life. But she hasn't given up - and she now knows she doesn't have to give up her virginity to make it happen.
"I've clearly proven my capacity for patience," she says, laughing.
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