More than any other job, parenting seems to present challenges for which there are no easy answers. Do you tell your son not to fight back when the bully hits him? Do you insist your daughter continue her piano lessons? Do you pay for A's and B's?
Such quandaries will never be simple. But Peter A. Gorski, a University of South Florida professor and developmental pediatrician with The Children's Board of Hillsborough County, offers tips to consider as you struggle through each new challenge.
•Appreciate each child's strengths and respect his or her limits. "It starts with recognizing the intrinsic worth of each child. Each child has areas of true strength."
•Set consistent, secure boundaries. "It demonstrates how much you care."
•Ask for help from a spouse and others on anything. It reduces your anxiety so you can be a more effective parent.
•Teach and learn from disappointments. "Always take the time to go over the experience for the sake of learning rather than punishing." Children come away feeling that they aren't bad; they just goofed up.
•Value your parental love and guidance as the greatest contribution to our nation's security, prosperity and civility. The success of civilization, Gorski points out, depends on the extent to which people grow up feeling valued, loved and able to contribute.
Philip Morgan
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