Helping Children Grieve

PARKLAND ESTATES - Butterflies dangle from the ceiling at LifePath Hospice Circle of Love Center for Grieving Children. Fresh yellow paint warms the hallways. Art supplies, games and a room with torso dummies and boxing gloves await children who have lost loved ones.

It's a nice change from the dreary place it used to be. Sharing office space with the hospice made it hard for the center to be child-friendly, volunteer Steve Furry said.

"This will have a great impact," he said at a ribbon-cutting July 1. "This atmosphere will be more comfortable, more of 'my' place. It truly looks like a kids' center."

The center, 3010 W. Azeele St., offers free small group meetings twice a month for about 70 children to interact or play on their own while their parents meet in another room, said bereavement manager Tammy Alsing.

The center is run by two employees and more than 40 volunteers, and is funded solely by donations.

The makeover was courtesy of the 24-member 2008 Leadership Westshore class, which chose the center for its legacy project.

"When we heard about them, it was pretty much hands down," said Rita Hattab, a Leadership Westshore class member and community relations coordinator at the MacDonald Training Center for developmentally disabled adults. "These kids are in a place no one wants them to be. I sincerely hope this will be a place where they may have a little support."

The center had asked Leadership Westshore for $1,400 for a grief cave, a room where children can mourn freely. Leadership Westshore raised $30,000, with donations from Carlton Fields, the Community Foundation, the Rotary Club of Tampa Bay and employees of Capital One Auto Financing, among others.

As a result, the project grew.

Renovations included flooring from Life Style Carpets, cabinets from Bay Area Cabinets and furniture from Rooms to Go. Games were added, including a Wii, and some leftover money will sponsor children to attend LifePath's summer camp.

The grief cave's black walls are lined with Plexiglas, allowing children to leave messages. The black light on the black fabric-draped ceiling gives the messages a glow.

"That cave is there for the deepest, darkest times," Hattab said.

Alsing said children tend to grieve cyclically, expressing sadness one minute and laughing 10 minutes later.

"We want to create the opportunity for them to move in and out of it," she said. "We get a sense that they don't know how to act when they grieve."

Letting out their feelings is crucial, Alsing said, and Leadership Westshore's gift gives them a place to do so.

"They raised all of the money, did the painting and did the organizing," Alsing said. "And they did it with a lot of compassion and a lot of love."

Reporter Jamie Pilarczyk can be reached at (813) 259-7661 or

TO LEARN MORE

For information on LifePath Hospice Circle of Love Center for Grieving Children, call (813) 877-2200 or 1-800-209-2200 or go to www.lifepath-hospice.org.

For information on the Westshore Alliance and its Leadership Westshore program, call (813) 289-5488 or go to www.choose westshore.com.